20 Jul

Not My Way

I have been feeling really lousy lately. Things don't seem to go my way and I have been feeling really sick.

Firstly - I couldn't catch up with the strokes during fast recovery, usually I'm able to and during long pull, I couldn't even last for 2 minutes and during 10 hard strokes, I wanted to pull oh-so-hard but I just couldn't do it.

Everyone was shouting at me and I'm feeling so bad, oh-so-bad at that point of time, no more godly feeling but feeling so godly lousy. I was so discouraged at that time and I felt so like quiting right away, go back to the ponton, dig a fucking big hole and bury myself and rest in without peace.

When training ended, something bad happened - Gastric pain, and the pain persist til I fell asleep. After I woke up in the morning, my gastric doesn't hurt anymore but I feel a sharp pain on my left chest even now.

I don't take this lightly as I find it quite serious. I'm still thinking if I should go to training tomorrow, but if I miss training now, I'm unlikely to be able to stay in Team A.

It isn't hard to be good from time to time in sports. What's tough is being good every day.

Wish me well and I will come back stronger. And if I got a little luckier, you watch your back.